When Success Doesn’t Feel Successful

by Jennifer Hama, LPC, CPCS

Perfectionism is often an idealized problem in our society, yet those who struggle with it know something others don’t:

You never feel successful.

. Your resume and CV are full of amazing accomplishments yet you don’t feel successful. The resume doesn’t reflect the disappointment of what you thought you would feel once you had this title or made that amount of money. The reality is perfectionism works against us.

You work hard to get away from your past, but you never truly leave it behind because it’s the driving force of your motivation. The more you try to be perfect, the worse you feel.

Perfectionism is like a drug

You have to achieve more and more to get that high, chasing the dragon; but it never ends with satisfaction. The harder you work the more worthless you feel successfully, when perfectionism is behind it. It’s not that you’re not working hard, it’s that your spinning your wheels in the wrong direction. It’s like going 100mph on a treadmill and getting mad at yourself for not going there.

How do I stop?

1) Aim for 88%

2) set a timer

3) talk it out to a therapist

Jennifer Hama, LPC, CPCS I have a core belief that a sense of humor is essential to living a fulfilling life. And I like to recognize mine. Regularly. I hate laundry and psychobabble, but I love uncensored real talk. It’s necessary for you to know this. Also, I have a white board that I go everywhere with. While it’s entertaining to watch me roll it around the office while trying not to trip, it’s also a powerful therapy tool, helping you visualize your struggles and brainstorm solutions. I don’t do “therapy speak, ” I shoot straight, and believe in giving you practical tools to help you change your life.oes here

Learn more about Jennifer and CBT, Here

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